Tip 7079: The Mirror Technique
Want to get cooperation from your negotiating opponent? Want to reach a position of balance with your opponent? Want to eliminate the 'one upsmanship' that seems to dominate the typical 'I win, you lose' posturing? Want to keep your opponent from getting the better of you (and at the same time, keep you from getting the better of him)?
We need to recognize that what's good for one, is typically good for the other. That balance, that logic is hard to ignore.
So what's the mirror technique and how can we use it? Perhaps the best way to describe or explain it is to say that one simply gains cooperation from their opponent by matching, mimicking or mirroring every tactic or technique they use during the bargaining.
If they act insulted, you act insulted. If they get loud and aggressive, you get loud and aggressive. If they get calm and cooperative, you get calm and cooperative. It's the simple to understand, easy to use technique of 'doing to them, what they do to you."
It's hard for people to get upset by its use because you're simply returning what you're experiencing.
Examples:
During the negotiations or bargaining for the purchase of a new car, a salesman was heard saying to a customer as the negotitions were breaking down, "I can't believe you're going to miss the chance to own this vehicle for the sake of $300." The customer replied, "I can't believe you're going to miss a chance to sell this vehicle for the sake of $300." How disarming this would be to the car dealer. If, by his logic, the customer shouldn't worry about an amount as small as $300, why then should the dealer be concerned about $300? Powerful. Easy to apply. Effective.
A tenant was trying to get a concession from their landlord regarding the renewal of a lease. The tenant assumed the landlord wouldn't want to lose him as existing tenant and deal with the aggravation of finding a new tenant and possiblly having the property vacant for a while. The tenant, at a point in the hard bargaining shared, "Perhaps I better look at some other properties which might be available at better terms than you're offering." The landlord, applying the mirror technique, responded "Maybe I should check with some people who had, in the past, voiced interest in this place. Maybe they'd want to move into the property." The strategy is clear, if you want to use the "Power of Competition" on me, I can use it on you.
You'll see possibilities for the mirror technique all the time.
· When a vendor gets insulted at your low offer, get insulted at their high price.
· When a buyer compliments a feature of a property they're considering, compliment them of being perceptive and observant.
· When a customer says they think they ought to get a concession, ask them to justify why one should be given to them.
· If a buyer greatly improves their offer, respond with a significant concession in return dealing with a non-monatary item (time, closing, storage, repairs, items included, etc.)
· If a customer says they'll refer more business to you in exchange for a discount, accept the arrangment conditioned upon the realization of new (referred) business.
Good negotiators are adept a mirror-ing.
They match their opponents when it comes to attitude, proposals and creativity.
Remember, it's taking a technique that your opponent thinks is fair and using that very technique right back on them. Try it. You'll like it.
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